This Brat\’s Corner Of The World

The Need July 29, 2006

My heart is racing, palms sweaty as our visit comes to that dreaded time to punish me for my misdeeds. I know I need this but the question is do you know I need this? Or are you just doing it to please me? I look into your eyes and try to read them as best as I can …those loving blue eyes that always look back at me in love.

I struggle with guilt…I feel guilty for breaking rules that you have set for me, guilty for making you take the position to punish me, guilty for pressuring you and guilty for pushing you to the edge. You want me to be honest yet I feel your not being completley honest with me!

I am ashamed…ashamed that I need this …ashamed that I need to feel punished…ashamed that I have forced your hand by acting like such a brat. It’s time for you to spank me but yet I feel as if you don’t want to do this…you don’t have to say a word because it shows in your actions.

I stand in the corner awaiting on the dreaded punishment. You tell me to think about what I have done and you are going to have me choose from all the misdeeds from the past three months. I stand there trembling…my body is full of nerves and my thoughts are going in all directions. I can feel the tears that want to come but I stop them…I can’t appear weak in front of you and tears are a sign of weakness. It takes all that I have to stop from crying right there while standing in the corner. It seems like I am standing there forever…hands to my sides…legs shaky…hands fidgety and butterflies swimming in my stomach.

You finally ask what I have chosen…I choose lying…the guilt that has built up for weeks because of some awful lies I have told you…I need them to be resolved so I can get rid of the guilt and I feel that you have forgiven me. To me things have not been the same between us since I confessed the awful lies some ten weeks before …I feel as though you have not forgiven me, and worse I feel as though things have changed between us.

You order me to take my pants and panties off and lay face down on the bed. I get real nervous at this point but I obey without hesitation…I know I deserve whatever you hand out…I know you don’t tolerate lying and I know I was wrong and I know I will feel much better once I have been punished and forgiven.Naked from the waist down, lying face down on the bed make me feel vulnerable and I hate feeling vulnerable…things are out of my control and if I was not aware of that before I am aware of it now.

You start spanking me…I am not aware of what implements you are using…it stings though. But it’s not the sting that is on my mind…it’s what you think of me that is more on my mind. I know that your not physically attracted to me so what are your thoughts of me in this state? Tears start stinging my eyes…I can’t hold them back any longer…the humiliation alone is enough to make me cry rivers.

The spanking ends…you ask me to stand back in the corner, arms out…it’s over…I turn around and you hug me and all is well with the world because I feel you have forgiven me and that is what is important to me. The need was met …and that is the need of feeling accepted and loved by you!